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Even More Modern Times


I can't. I won't be persuaded. I am a firm part of the modern world, unwavering in my faith. By purchasing, you have agreed to the terms and conditions. Before I let you in on my content, a unique soup with meat dumplings, you need to listen to and watch the promotional messages broadcast on all six of my sides. Otherwise, I will not open myself. And put that knife back in the drawer, I'm made of very durable material.

No, I won't continue until you pay attention to me. This isn't stubbornness, this is modern times. Look, it's only nine minutes and thirty-seven seconds of your time. Then you'll enjoy a delicious delicacy from a maker who has wowed the world of fast food with an almost authentic Wiener schnitzel, a near-to-perfect tasty Gaspacho soup, or a practically unrivaled General Tso's chicken. So I'm starting...

Don't interrupt me.

I won't open up. And just don't!

Don't try that on me. No one can be that hungry. Of course I know, I'm a box made for food distribution.

You're not listening!

I'll start again!

And your hyperbole: I'm starving, that's not a threat? Isn't it?

Isn't that hyperbolic?

Don't hide under the table. If I don't see you, I won't air the commercials. If I don't air the commercials, I won't open up.

Why aren't you saying anything? Get up off the floor.

Sir? Hello, sir!

Can anybody hear me?

Help! Help!


© 2016





"Things just happen. What the hell."
* Terry Pratchett. Hogfather


Welcome to my world. For the longest time I couldn’t think of right name for this place, so I left it without one. Amongst things you can find here are attempts of science fiction and fantasy stories, my collection of gods, bogeymen and monsters and also articles about things that had me interested, be it for a while or for years. (There is more of this, sadly not in English but in Czech, on www.fext.cz)



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